confessions of a cookie junkie

A few weeks ago I read an article about a food critic who struggled with obesity and how he decided to become vegan everyday until dinnertime, thus losing a ton of weight without giving up everything for good. I read this triumphant tale in the wee hours of the morning after just getting into work (read: not fully awake). As I took swigs of my coffee (with cream), I began writing a chipper email to a colleague, an all-the-time vegan. "Guess what? I'm going to try this! I'm going to be vegan until 6 pm every day!" I patted myself on the back for being so clever. Healthy habits, ahoy! It was only then did I realize that in between keystrokes, I had grabbed and consumed a handful of cheddar bunnies (the organic and slightly less processed version of Goldfish). Oh, wait. That means no cheese. Well, f&%^ that idea.

I'm a terrible dieter. Fact is, I'm far too nice to myself when I'm on a diet because even on the worst of food days, I can still remind myself, "Well, it's not like I ate an entire pizza - that's way worse," or "Way to not buy a dozen cupcakes and eat them all in one sitting, Laura - you're SO HEALTHY!" I'm so good at summoning up lists of things I didn't eat that day that I conveniently forget all the things that I did. See what I mean? Worst dieter ever.

One of my greatest weaknesses in life are baked goods. Brownies, cake, pie... whatever. It's all delicious, it's all for me. Working in a residential hall on campus means easy access to far too many baked goods, 24 hours a day. Now even laziness isn't a preventive shield against the stuff. A few weeks ago a colleague and I began actually taking our 10-minute afternoon break (crazy, right?) at work to grab a cookie and sit outside and thaw our overly air-conditioned bodies in the hot Texas sun. We talk about whatever is on our mind and eat our cookies together. It's basically bliss and has easily become the best part of my day, and that's not just because of the cookie, although it certainly helps.

I think I've always been a cookie monster, only now my monster-like tendencies are paired with becoming an afternoon break monster and a talk-about-my-feelings monster... and that's good enough for me. Sing it with me: cookie, cookie, cookie starts with C!!!!

Where'd she go?

Work's been a bear.

Be back soon.

I'd give you one if I could.

Have you given anyone a hug today?

Hope so.

Joie de text.

"I love living by myself. I'm eating marshmallows dipped in chocolate, drinking wine, and watching Dawson's Creek. PS, I went out on Saturday night, got completely bombed, and proceeded to tell a group of hot guys that they were 98 Degrees. Then, I pointed out who was in the group. Then I talked to "Drew Lachey" for an hour and made my friend give him my number."

- Joy, in the form of a text message

That was Wisconsin.

Behold, the dairy state.

I recently took my first vacation since beginning my job last year. Subsequently, I also had my first post-vacation experience which can only described as vacation hangover. Typical to other experiences I've, uh, had - vacation hangover felt strikingly similar: Headache. Grumpiness. Overall malaise with sudden, persistent cravings for mac and cheese. Periodic whimpering.


It makes sense, though. If you suddenly take away afternoon naps, increase temperatures by 30+ degrees, AND return to 40-hour work weeks, grumpy pants can't be too far away. Especially coming off a vacation which involved:

Hanging out with my nieces and nephew

Spending time with friends

Grilling out with my family

And, of course, cheese!

It's always hard to come back from vacation. Still, I'm joyful for the time I got to spend with family and friends this summer. No matter how long I live in Texas, Wisconsin will always be my home.

How to be alone